A snowstorm had hit Portland the night before, and David Emami was thrilled when he awoke to a winter wonderland outside. Work was canceled, and David had plans to spend the entire day drinking hot chocolate, making snow angels, and yelling at children when they got in his way.
To start the day off, David went to his cupboard to grab the hot chocolate. None was to be found. “Gosh darnit!” David couldn’t believe he had forgotten the single most important part of a snow day. Suddenly, his plans changed: he had to walk down the street to get hot chocolate.
David bundled up from head to toe and was ready to go outside. He also tied knit beanies on Fred and Barbra Streisand’s heads, even though they had no intention of going outside. “That should keep you warm!” he said as they ran away in shame.
David nearly slipped the moment he went outside. He steadied himself and started down the sidewalk. Some children were building a snowman, which David stopped to watch.
“Great work, boys!” They looked up at him and pretended to smile, even though they were actually scared. “Don’t forget a carrot for a nose! Want me to get one for your at the store?” Their mother grabbed their hands and pulled them away.
“No, you don’t need to do that,” she said as they walked down the street, leaving the half-built snowman behind.
David continued his trek and at last made it to the supermarket. He went straight to the hot chocolate, only to find it sold out completely.
“What in the world? How can this be?” David looked for an employee, then berated them for his loss. “On a snowy day like this, how can an incompetent establishment like this be out of hot chocolate?”
The man apologized, then said, “Well, it looks like we are indeed out, but do have spiced cider if you’re into that.”
“Who in their right mind would want to drink hot apple juice?”
“Okay… well we also have this sugar free hot chocolate on sale.”
David glared at him. “What? So I can die of aspartame consumption? I’d rather drink urine!” David walked away without another word.
On his way home, David saw a patch of clean, smooth snow, and after looking around for a moment, fell onto the snow to make a snow angel. He spread out his arms and legs and felt like a kid again. He then got up and smiled at his creation. Hot chocolate or not, it was still a very good day.
David Emami is Alone in Portland is a collection of stories that peer into the life of a middle-aged curmudgeon with a fondness for cats and antiques.
Playfully illustrated with Bitmoji characters, his story comes to life as each day brings a new adventure.
He was obsessive compulsive and mad about antiques. The apartment was covered, top to bottom, in decor that would be more aligned with that of an old woman that peaked in the 1960s. david-emami-takes-on-portland.html
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